Thursday, February 21, 2013

Tired

Dear Sleep,
Without you I become a neurotic mess. I feel more of an urgency to take on my daily routines, my head is clouded and I tend to forget what I am doing. I become crabby and believe that the whole world is supposed to be considerate of the fact that I haven’t gotten enough sleep. I realize how imperfect I am. I see that I don’t handle stressful situations on low-energy. Let’s face it I need you sleep in order to stay positive in my environment.
Sincerely,
An Exhausted Jessica
And lately I haven’t been getting very much of sleep.  I’m really thinking it has a lot to do with my incisions and all the stress my body has been through during surgery which I had a little over four weeks ago. (Time flies!) I also think it’s all this wedding talk. It’s not stressing me out at all, but I am always thinking about it and somehow repetitive thoughts tend to haunt my sleep. Like last night for example, I woke up at 4AM because I couldn’t stop thinking about caterers… Then my other thoughts have been based on Michael and his job. He’s been very distracted by it lately and it’s definitely been on my mind too. It’s been such a long journey for both of us so we were praying for good news nearly every day. He heard some bittersweet news yesterday but I’m not fully sure what all the details are. I trust that God will provide clarity for the both of us and I’m also praying that we’ll be close together once again. It’s been really hard and it sucks to see him so frustrated. I just want all of this confusion to end and to end in clarity.
And those are my thoughts.
-Jessica

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